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Mengapa Orang Suka Menggunakan Silent Treatment Dalam Hubungan?

Mengapa Orang Suka Menggunakan Silent Treatment Dalam Hubungan?
Ilustrasi silent treatment. Credits: Freepik.

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Silent treatment adalah perilaku tidak berbicara atau berinteraksi secara verbal terhadap seseorang secara sengaja. Perilaku ini biasanya dilakukan sebagai bentuk ekspresi ketidakpuasan, kemarahan atau ketidaksetujuan, sering dilakukan untuk melukai orang lain.

Silent treatment termasuk bentuk manipulasi emosional yang dapat menyebabkan ketegangan dalam hubungan, baik hubungan dengan keluarga, sahabat atau pasangan. Seseorang menganggap bahwa dengan menarik diri, tidak berkomunikasi dan menganggap orang lain tidak ada, mereka dapat menghukum orang lain, memanipulasi, atau menghindari konflik. Apa yang membuat seseorang sebenarnya melakukan silent treatment pada orang lain?

 

Penyebab Perilaku Silent Treatment

Perilaku diam (silent treatment) adalah bentuk komunikasi yang tidak sehat karena perilaku ini tidak membantu menyelesaikan masalah. Sebaliknya, perilaku ini justru dapat memperburuk ketegangan dan konflik. Memungkinkan konflik yang terjadi justru menjadi lebih besar, tidak terselesaikan atau terus berlarut-larut.

Ada banyak alasan mengapa seseorang memilih melakukan silent treatment, di antaranya:

Tidak bisa berkomunikasi dengan baik

Salah satu penyebab seseorang melakukan silent treatment adalah keterampilan komunikasi yang buruk. Beberapa orang tidak tahu bagaimana cara mengekspresikan perasaan dengan efektif sehingga terkadang sulit baginya untuk berbicara terbuka tentang perasaannya. Lebih mudah untuk tidak berbicara dibandingkan menyampaikan hal-hal yang menjadi ganjalan dalam hatinya.

Kurangnya keterampilan komunikasi dapat mengakibatkan kesalahpahaman, kebingungan, dan konflik. Dalam menghadapi orang yang seperti ini, Anda perlu mengajak untuk berbicara terbuka, memahami perasaan satu sama lain, mendengarkan secara aktif, dan mempertimbangkan mencari bantuan profesional untuk mengembangkan keterampilan komunikasi yang lebih baik.

Baca Juga: Silent Treatment Justru Memperburuk Hubungan, Ini Alasannya

 

Kurangnya kesadaran diri

Ada orang-orang yang merasa kebingungan atau kewalahan dengan perasaan yang sedang mereka rasakan dan tidak tahu bagaimana cara mengekspresikannya. Perilaku silent treatment menjadi hal yang mereka lakukan sebagai cara untuk menunjukkan bahwa mereka sedang marah.

 

Cara untuk menghindari konflik

Seseorang mungkin tidak merasa cukup aman untuk mengungkapkan hal-hal yang sedang dirasakan. Ada berbagai macam alasannya, seperti karena adanya rasa takut terhadap pikiran, perasaan atau perilaku, baik dari mereka sendiri maupun dari orang lain yang sedang bermasalah dengan mereka. Ada juga orang-orang yang cenderung bersikap pasif ketika melihat akan terjadi konflik, dan silent treatment menjadi salah satu cara untuk menghindari diri dari berhadapan terhadap situasi yang tidak nyaman.

 

Memiliki trauma di masa kecil

Trauma di masa kecil dapat berdampak signifikan pada cara seseorang berinteraksi. Trauma seperti pelecehan seksual, kekerasan, perceraian orang tua, menyebabkan anak cenderung mengembangkan mekanisme pertahanan diri termasuk menghindari atau menutup diri dari orang lain. Mekanisme inilah yang memungkinkan melakukan perilaku diam sebagai bentuk perlindungan diri dari perasaan kecewa, marah saat menjadi orang dewasa.

Perilaku diam dilakukan sebagai bentuk manipulasi atau hukuman terhadap orang lain akibat reaksi dari kecemasan atau tekanan yang dialami.

Baca Juga: Cara untuk Menghadapi Silent Treatment Dalam Hubungan

 

Sebagai metode pertahanan diri negatif

Setiap orang memiliki mekanisme pertahanan diri sendiri, baik yang positif maupun negatif. Mekanisme pertahanan diri yang negatif cenderung tidak membantu memecahkan masalah, namun justru membuatnya lebih buruk. Misalnya, menghindar, silent treatment, penggunaan zat terlarang, bekerja berlebihan, perfeksionisme, agresi.

Metode pertahanan diri yang negatif mungkin dimiliki akibat kesulitan dalam mengelola atau mengontrol emosi.

 

Perlakuan diam bisa merusak komunikasi, memperburuk konflik dan merusak kesehatan hubungan. Terapi mungkin adalah hal yang dibutuhkan untuk mengatasi perilaku tidak sehat ini. Terapis akan membantu Anda memahami akar masalah dan mengidentifikasi cara-cara yang lebih sehat untuk berkomunikasi. Jangan ragu untuk mencari pertolongan profesional bila Anda mengalami masalah dalam hubungan dan terjebak dalam perilaku silent treatment.

Memiliki keluhan atau gejala kesehatan yang ingin diketahui? Anda bisa memanfaatkan layanan konsultasi kesehatan dengan mengunduh aplikasi Ai Care melalui App Store atau Play Store.

 

Mau tahu informasi seputar penyakit lainnya? Cek di sini, ya!

 

 

Writer : Agatha Writer
Editor :
  • dr Hanifa Rahma
Last Updated : Rabu, 18 Oktober 2023 | 05:39

Kristin Davin, LMHC (2022). The Silent Treatment: Signs & How to Respond. Available from: https://www.choosingtherapy.com/silent-treatment/ 

Bernard Golden, Ph.D (2022). Why the Silent Treatment Is Such a Destructive Form of Passive-Aggression. Available from: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/overcoming-destructive-anger/202209/why-the-silent-treatment-is-such-destructive-form-passive 

Kurt Smith, PsyD, LMFT, LPCC, AFC (2022). The Silent Treatment: Is It a Form of Abuse?. Available from: https://psychcentral.com/health/the-silent-treatment 

Marissa Moore (2023). How a Lack of Clear Communication Can Affect Your Life, and Ways to Improve It. Available from: https://psychcentral.com/relationships/is-lack-of-communication-a-red-flag 

The National Child Traumatic Stress Network. About Child Trauma. Available from: https://www.nctsn.org/what-is-child-trauma/about-child-trauma 

Zawn Villines (2023). Can emotional abuse cause PTSD?. Available from: https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/ptsd-from-emotional-abuse 

Alexa Donelly, LCSW (2023). Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms: What They Are & How to Stop Using Them. Available from: https://www.choosingtherapy.com/unhealthy-coping-mechanisms/ 

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